Watch the judgement please!

         Boy are we a judgemental people.  God.. ..give us mercy and understanding for one another.

                                                            
      I LOVE to "people watch"!  There are times it brings me joy, and times it makes me so, so sad.  The beach, Disneyland, vacation spots, restaurants, and even the mall are all amazing places to watch people and to see their interactions with one another.  It is also a place of great temptation to let our hearts and minds become critical and judgemental.  Boy...does it happen QUICK within us!
     We all want peace in the world, peace between countries, peace within races, politics, etc......BUT how many of us start within ourselves first? How many times a day do we "take captive" our thoughts and give someone the benefit of the doubt or try to put ourselves in someone else's shoes before our mind rips them to shreds or we mumble an unkind, sarcastic criticism? 

      This has never been more real to me than these last 10 years dealing with Multiple Sclerosis and a body slowly deteriorating.   I can't tell you how many times a week I hear "but you look so good".  Ughhhh!   Unless I am in my wheelchair , or using my cane, which I can't really hold anymore and tend to trip over, I "look" okay.   People mean well, of course, but it does get me thinking of others with "hidden" pain that may look okay on the outside but their struggle is so painful and debilitating on the inside. 

    Last week I went to the grocery store.  I don't drive a whole lot anymore, but need to get out whenever I can.  My leg was pretty numb and heavy, so I used my handicap placard and pulled into the  spot.  There was a lady parking next to me that looked at me like I had stolen someone's handicap card and was cheating.   Her look was throwing daggers silently my way!   Sadly, this happens a lot.   I am only in my 40's and probably look a little suspicious getting out of my car in a handicap spot.   Most of the time I let it roll off my back knowing most people don't get it.   But this day was a particularly high pain day and my patience and "joyfulness" was running out!!  I have to admit, I was pretty PG-13 in my head toward her and had to pray instantly for patience not to say what was on my mind.    Then......a moment later a mom parked in the other handicap spot across from me and got her little girl out.   Her daughter "looked" just fine, but I could tell after knowing a few kids like her, that she was "handicap" too.   The mom looked at me and I looked at her and instantly there was a precious moment of understanding, of grace, and of a kindred spirit.  We smiled knowingly at each other.  In that sweet moment I didn't care about miss judgemental on the other side of me, I only cared that I got the privilege of being that one person showing a little understanding to a tired Mom who's daughter "looked fine on the outside" but was a special needs girl. 

      I have the privilege of sharing life with a few friends who's kids have some special needs.  I have witnessed the same judgment and lack of grace toward them that I occasional receive.  It's exhausting sometimes for them.   Let's all remember that what we see on the outside is rarely EVER an indication of what is going on on the inside.  We ALL have things that handicap us in our lives.  Whether a special needs child, cancer, a struggling marriage, loss, a debilitating disease, financial crisis, grief, depression......we all need grace and need to do a better job of giving it to one another.   Let's remember that next time we see a screaming kid, a tired parent, someone in a handicap spot, a frown, etc.  Be careful to not make a judgment call.....God may just need you to be the little bit of joy they get that day.

Here are some resources to help us understand the struggles someone around us might
 be facing.   Take the time to inform yourself and you will see more opportunities to show a little kindness.

Who knows.....one day the kindness might be a gift for you. 
     

Multiple Sclerosis:
     http://www.nationalmssociety.org/index.aspx
Cancers:
     http://www.cancer.org/
Sensory Processing Disorder:
     http://www.sinetwork.org/about-sensory-processing-disorder.html
Autism:
http://www.autismspeaks.org/
Angelman Syndrome:
http://www.angelman.org/
Anxiety, Depression, Bi-Polar Disorders
http://www.mentalhealth.com/p20-grp.html
Chronic Pain:
http://www.theacpa.org/default.aspx
Little People:
http://www.lpaonline.org/mc/
Lupus:
www.lupus.org
Grief:
http://grief.com/
Help for struggling marraiges
http://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage.aspx

Humbly........Debby

Lay it all at the Cross

    I remember an object lesson we did a few years ago at the Crossline Women's retreat .  The speaker brought in a huge cross, dimmed the lights and put a light behind it, and then stood only where the shadow was.  Her point was that we need to keep ourselves, our past, our struggles, our sin, our hopes, and our future in the "shadow" of the cross.  I remember being so moved that a few months later I did the same lesson with a group of darling 14 year old girls.  They were going through typical teen issues, but to many of them, they were overwhelmed with the burden.  Just the thought and promise that we can lay our problems "in the shadow of the cross" is a gift that only God can give.  As you can see in the picture, the girls wrote down their fears and prayer requests and layed them in the shadow of the cross.  I remember a few tears and some beautiful insights that several of the girls shared. 

     Today is Good Friday.  I love that it is called "Good" Friday.  I posted on my facebook today what I remember my Dad saying to me when i was a little girl.  We talked about what Good friday meant, the history lesson, the sacrifice....how it changed history.  I remember him saying "you don't have to be depressed on Good Friday, but just try to spend the next two days thinking about what your life, your heart, your hope would be like without God....and THEN see how you really feel on Easter morning".  Wise words from my wise father.    Andy and I shared that thought today with our girls.

  I couldn't go 5 minutes without walking down the hall talking to God like I do most mornings....then I thought...WOW, what if i was talking to NOTHING....NO-ONE?!  

 I don't want it............a life without God. 

Thank you for your sacrifice Lord, please help me to be worthy.  Thank you for loving me enough  to look down at me from the cross and say....

 "this is for you". 

  Help me to live my life in the "shadow' of your cross.

Stood here in 1985.  Amazing!